3.1 “I love school” – Said no teen ever! … Continued …

Welcome back to those of you who read the first part of this blog already, and my apologies for being so incredibly late. For those of you who have not, I suggest reading blog 3.0 first, then come back to this one. These articles are to do with increasing your child or student’s motivation in school. Regardless of their problem area: emotional, behavioral, academic performance, or social; increasing their school motivation has tremendous benefits. I am sure you all agree. So let me get straight to the next tip!

2. Build confidence. Helping to build your child’s self-confidence has multiple benefits. A confident teen is more likely to fight off the social stressors of school. They will have a higher chance of not falling victim to bullying, not feeling isolated and lonely, as well as avoiding a low sense of belonging to name a few. Not to forget, a confident teen typically understands that occasional academic failures are not permanent, and is more likely to be resilient, with the ability to put forth the required effort. Now, if you enforce tip 1, you are automatically helping to develop your child’s confidence. Acknowledge their strengths and praise efforts in all areas: social, emotional, and academic.

“Hun, I think it’s great that you have one great friend that you can rely on. I had a ton of ‘friends’ growing up, but none that I would consider my ‘ride or die.’”

Be their role model when it comes to confidence. Teens seem to learn more quickly by example. If they like what they see, they will try to embody it. And hey, if your confidence needs a boost too … work on it together with your child! Look at that, now we’re feeding two birdies with one seed; Saving time in this fast-paced world!

Do you know what else usually works? Developing their

Some more benefits of building your child’s confidence you ask? Increased assertiveness, positivity, ambition/drive, persistency, independence, enthusiasm, self-esteem, and mental wellness. Boom!

3. Be warm and fuzzy. Take interest for example. Children, teens, and even young adults need to know you are genuinely interested to know what you claim to want to know. If you’re asking for the sake of asking, they will sense it and will not bother to answer, or give you a genuine answer. “So how was school” … may only generate a simple, vague answer: “it was fine”. So how do you show genuine interest? Well, for starters … maybe genuinely be interested in your child! Try asking something specific or voluntarily share a short incident of yours at school. “Didn’t you have history class today? How are you liking it, I always struggled with that one class back in my days.” Take them out! Take interest in their hobbies. Go for a walk and try to get your teen to talk. Talk over a coffee date. Watch a movie of their choice, and then talk. Talk about the movie, try to tie it into school, or don’t. When parents and children are together (perhaps right after dinner) create an ongoing tradition for “talk time”. Pass an object around, whoever has the object gets to speak. They want to hear from you too. Your teen is less likely to open up to you about their life, if they don’t feel like they know much about yours. Share work stories, grocery store incidences, anything really.

Be warm and fuzzy with your child in general! Give them a tight squeeze and let them know how you hate knowing that they’re growing, because you want them near to you. Hug them because it’s nice to see them after a long day at work. Say you love them. Basically, show affection, show you care and adore them (without smothering them of course). Words and actions! They want to hear the love and interest, but they need to see it too.

Consistency is key!! You cannot apply these tips for a couple of days, or weeks, and then go back to being a couch potato! Noooo! No, no, no, no, no! Consistency is key, particularly with younger children as well as young adults. Be consistent in what you do.

If your child is already at a more severe stage of negative behaviors, severely depressed, or suffering otherwise at school, despite your efforts, please do not hesitate to reach out to counselors or other mental health professionals in your area to assist. This article does not have super powers and cannot guarantee that your child will never develop a more serious academic, behavioral, or emotional difficulty in school.